I'm actually posting again! Within less than 5 months can you believe it?!?
So this weeks "How To" has been requested quite a lot by people who saw how devastated I was during my last break-up and how well I've recovered since, and wanted tips on how to move on and forget about your ex.
Now I'm not going to lie to go, I'm always 100% honest with you guys, it's not going to be easy. There's no definitive way to get over somebody, no set guide or tips that always work but I'm just going to share with you some tips that work for me.
Quick disclaimer: I'm not saying that doing these things will make you magically get over someone overnight, because I'm a strong believer that if you love somebody, you won't ever truly be fully over them. You'll still think about them occasionally and miss them but these tips just help the process a little bit.
TIP 1- DISTRACT YOURSELF!
This is the most important one for me. I always feel most upset when I'm just sat alone and have time to gather my thoughts; usually at night time (I don't know if it's just me but I always get so much more emotional on a night time.)
So I find that it's a good idea to keep my mind busy whether that's by watching a movie or binge watching a TV series while eating way too many biscuits (come on that's what we all do on a Saturday night anyway) or maybe even getting creative with some painting/drawing. I find books such as Wreck This Journal really good for things like this as it has instructions on what to do on each page but you can go about them in whatever way you want; either following the directions literally or being as creative as you like! I've almost completed my WTJ and I'm so excited about it because it's just such an accurate representation of me as a person.
Instead of sitting on your bed and crying for hours on end, take this time to do any school work you've been putting off, or just read a book so you can become involved in a fictional character's heartbreak rather than focusing on your own.
There's so many things you can do to stay distracted so make sure you find yourself something to do! Giving yourself sympathy is the worst course of action.
TIP 2- SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POSITIVITY!
Similarly to tip 1, do things that make you happy, whether that be taking up a hobby you enjoy but can't seem to find the time for anymore or hanging out with close friends who you know can always make you laugh despite the situation. Sitting around thinking about how sad you are isn't going to solve anything so try make yourself cheer up, even if that just involves eating A LOT of ice cream (my personal tactic.)
TIP 3- CLEAR OUT THEIR THINGS!
Now by this, I don't mean throw away everything they ever owned or got you or stuff that reminds you of them (which is probably pretty much everything.) Organisation is another really good tactic for keeping your mind active and have you never heard of the phrase "out of site, out of mind"? Store any items that he may have given you in a box until you feel able to look at them again without bawling your eyes out. I do this and it makes me feel so much better after I've de-cluttered and no longer have to see things he gave me every time I walk in my room to remind me of how sad and lonely I am.. I'm not bitter, honest.
TIP 4- BE AWARE OF SOCIAL MEDIA!
Obsessively stalking his social media pages and spamming him with "I love you" texts are not going to help the situation in the slightest. I know it's easy to think to yourself "maybe if he sees my texts he'll remember all the good times we spent together" but I'm sorry to tell you, he won't. Usually if he says it's over, he means it. Constantly sending him messages will only make it worse, and he will more than likely get annoyed at you too. If you feel like it will be difficult for you to not message him, or refresh his Instagram every five seconds waiting for another girls name to appear in his bio, I suggest you block him on all social media to avoid even more heartbreak (at least for a while until you've calmed down.)
TIP 5- AVOID CONTACT
This is going to be difficult if you two are in classes or at work together but it is really important that you limit seeing your ex as much as you can, especially for the first few months after the break-up. Seeing them is going to provoke strong emotions whether that's love and devastation or hatred and anger, neither is going to help the situation so you should aim to avoid them as best you can. Don't suggest just "staying friends" as we all know two people who've been in a relationship can never really stay in a platonic friendship without somebody being hurt, but obviously if you have to see them you should stay civil and be polite (don't give them the satisfaction of seeing you hurt.)
There you go guys, 5 of my tips for surviving a rough breakup. I hope you're all having a good day and make sure to leave any feedback in the comments!